Unequal Childhoods

“Unequal Childhoods,” penned by Annette Lareau, delves into the varied parenting styles observed in diverse socioeconomic scenarios. It suggests that middle-class families, regardless of race, employ “concerted cultivation,” a method heavily involved in children’s upbringing, contrasting with the “natural growth” approach prevalent in working-class or impoverished families.

Each parenting style has its pros and cons. For instance, “natural growth” may limit opportunities for learning new skills but fosters autonomy and resourcefulness in entertainment. It also instills an appreciation for parental efforts in children. Conversely, children in middle-class families often remain oblivious to their privileges, attributing their success solely to their endeavors, despite their parents’ substantial involvement.

I find one element crucial to the prospective success of middle-class children. It’s a concept I’ve observed but lacked the proper term for until the author clarified it: the ability to interact with institutions. Institutions embody entities holding authority or power, including school teachers, doctors, sports team coaches, lawyers, bosses, government officials, and other professionals.

All parents aspire to offer the best life to their children, irrespective of their social class. However, interactions with institutions serve as the differentiator. Middle-class parents, with their understanding of institutional workings, instill trust and communicative competence in their children. They empower their children to negotiate, summarize, highlight, and clarify. Consequently, children feel “entitled” and see influencing authority as legitimate.

Conversely, the limited institutional knowledge of working-class and impoverished families engenders reverence for educators’ expertise. Ironically, educators desire a more assertive and involved approach from parents, aligning with concerted cultivation. In order to do so, parents need to have steadfast belief in their educational paths and should overcome the fear of error, providing value in education – aspects often lacking in working-class and poor families. As a result, their children miss developing robust verbal skills and testing adult limits through discussion and argumentation.

In summary, the knowledge deficit regarding institutions and self-doubt in guiding children through an institution-dominated world make parents from working-class and poor families less likely to train their children in institutional interaction and negotiation. This lack hinders children’s success in an institutionalized world. Conversely, the informed confidence of middle-class parents prepares children early in negotiation, inquiry, summarization, highlighting, and influence, paving their path to future success.

As mentioned in the beginning, while “concerted cultivation” offer numerous benefits, it posses downside as well. For an in-depth understanding, I recommend reading the book. I just find that it could be useful for kids from families lack of educations on interacting with institutions or authorities to know this concept, reflect on their own upbrining, and understand how this world works. After all, as the author posits, “The entire point of ethnography is to catch people in the routines of daily life, to reveal taken-for-granted aspects of their experience, and to make the background foreground.”